So I gets home from work and sees a shady van parked outside me house. I went right up to it and started peerin in de windows, like ya would right? So some buddy comes outta de van and starts talkin to me in French. I heard "chaud" so naturally I assumed he was talkin about me. Enticed, I started flippin me hair, poutin me lips, and hikin up me snowpants to try and show him a bitta calf dat was stickin outta me winter boot. He started givin me de eyes, looking me up and down, and shouting at me "tu n'as pas d'eau chaud". Well, I was tickled pink I was! Jackpot! So I said "buddy you're not so bad yerself dere! Why don't you come wit me and eat a bitta da codfish I got simmerin on de stove?"
So then he really gets excited right He goes "non espece de conne! Tu n'as pas D'EAU chaud!" and takes me by de hand, leadin me under the stairs of de patio in me backyard. So now I'm tinkin, now jeez dis 'by is real strange and kinky, I never even seen him before and wants to do it right dere in de snow under de porch! So I followed him. we went into de basement under de stairs, and lo and behold, right before me very eyes...FLOOD!!! Dere was water flickin outta it every which way, steam everywhere, and some kinda god awful bangin noise comin outta de top. Sure enough, hot water boiler blew.
Later dat night as I was boilin water to splash onto me "essentials" in the bathtub, I couldn't help but wonder why buddy was comin onto me so strong with all dat mess goin on!!!!!
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